When you believe in you… things happen

If you look around you and see people who are constantly struggling, and at times it looks like they get a foot hold to overcome, but somehow they slip right back to where they were or worse. For the most part, you can look at these cases and see that they have a lack of belief in themselves and what they should have in life. One of the things we learned during a personal development training at work is that we have what is a ‘self fulfilling prophecy’. Essentially it means that you thinking it makes it so. If you feel that how you live is what was meant to be, what was just in the cards, it is a subconscious desire to consistently stay in that state. There are stories of lottery winners, or other types of fast income, that make deteriorating decisions that put them back into the same state of affairs as they were before. It’s their comfort zone if you will. While the following is just my observations and thoughts, I hope that if you have a positive belief of your life, then it reinforces that. If you have a negative thought about your future, I hope that this will help you turn it around.

The manner in which we believe we are meant to live, is how we live. Each of us played make believe as a child – boy or girl – and when you played those games, you were never destitute/poor/unhappy. You pretended to be living the life you wanted to live when you grew up. Happy marriage, big bank account, healthy children, wonderful job that didn’t have you chained to a desk. Ask a child what they will be when they grow up and they have amazing professions – president, astronaut, etc. Just like the commercial said when I was a child, “No one says they want to be a loser when they grow up.” If we all start out in these positive flash forwards, what happens when we grow up? Well, as we grow, our brains not only learn new things, they also change structurally in making those new connections and hormones come into play. (Those pesky hormones… ) We grow and develop into adults and memorable events that happen in life overshadow our ability to see those past dreams as vividly as we did before as a child.

There are stories of millionaires that have unbelievable success, yet lose it all and then within a short time, they are back into millionaire status. You see people that were destitute, win the lottery, only to be in the same destitute position a few years later. I truly think that this is because they live what they believe through unconscious actions that put them where their belief resides. Kind of a ‘build it and they will come’ mentality. When watching a group of children, they are very supportive of each other – “you can do it”. As adults we typically don’t rally around each other in that manner. And we aren’t nearly as open to seek mentorship from people who live the life we want to live. Sometimes being independent can really be a downfall. What if those lottery winners had engaged the resources that successful people use to manage their funds? Would that support system have helped them to stay in the green?

Many people think ill of MLMs, network marketing, and relationship marketing, but I think that if you enter with an open mind, marketing a product you use and like, why can’t this be a good thing for your life? I will tell you what I have learned from my experiences in network marketing –

1. You need to know how the compensation plan works. Does it support team building? If it does not, it is going to be difficult to get your sponsor’s help with your business.

2. Know the company. What do they stand for? What is their expectation on quality? If you sell a product that must keep getting improved, it leaves a bitter taste in your customer’s mouth – especially when they were happy with the product as it was originally presented. Bottom line, they need to offer a stable product.

3. You have to have an open mind and believe that this is the ticket. No self doubt – you have to exude confidence in your business and your product.

4. You must believe that you will succeed and you need a support system that also believes. Remember? It’s the playground mentality of cheering everyone on just in the adult form. When you have a support system of team members, that whether they are directly connected with the success of your business or not, that regardless help keep your momentum going – it does make a person feel great. Just like getting chosen as captain of the foursquare team at recess.

5. Your leader must believe in you 100% and be there for you 100%. As a leader, you need to keep your recruits engaged by weekly chats, text messages, social media shout outs, etc. Remember the golden stars, the helper of the week? Weren’t those awesome!? Why can’t you have that feeling as an adult??

6. Most of all, you have to have a WHY. Also known as a huge dream, one so crazy, ridiculous if it happened, that it motivates you to succeed. As adults, we forget how to dream, we buried our dreams long ago and labeled them as just that… ‘dreams’. Dust them off and put them in the forefront of your daily life. Dreams are nothing with out plans to achieve them! Why are they important to success? You have to have a huge dream – something so crazy that if it came true, it would be blissful. Some are simple, some are complex. I will share with you my Why…

Stick with me, ok? This is a multi-faceted Why.

I grew up in a middle income family where both parents worked. It instilled in me the need for hard work and doing your absolute best. Lisa Alyssa brian in belly As I had my own family starting at 18, we struggled, even when we received regular paychecks, we lived pay check to pay check. I was only able to be an at home mom for two short years. I feel like I really missed out on things because after coming home from work, I was so tired! I returned to college and finished my bachelor’s and master’s degrees – I needed the ability to be more sought out by employers. And enter the student loans with massive payment amounts! When I was finished, I had a payment for my loans that equaled a quarter of my monthly income. Couple this with credit card debt, car loans, mortgage, etc. What a load of stress!! Did I forget to mention that my husband also went back to school and his loan payments are similar to mine? OUCH. But, we dealt with it because we truly believed better things would come! And you know what? We grew in those classes, it made us understand the business world better.

Then things took a super fast 180 degree turn. Over the course of three days I lost 85% of the vision in my right eye. It was like looking through a cheese cloth. The diagnosis was Multiple Sclerosis. After undergoing treatment of one hour per day/every day for a week of IV steroids, my vision came back almost 100%. Fortunately, I haven’t had any major relapses since then and it has been almost 10 years ago. However, the number one MS issue that has impacted my life? Fatigue. It is awful. Working a full time job takes the wind out of my sail and sometimes I simply don’t have energy to do anything else. It is more than just being tired, it is a physical inability to do anything. I can be dramatic, but the following explanation is not dramatic enough, trust me, I hope you never learn for yourself. But, this is how I describe it, as the word “fatigue” doesn’t cut the mustard. You get up out of bed, take a shower and put on a suit of armor. Before you connect the suit in it’s entirety, you pour concrete mixed with lead weights into the legs of the suit, filling the feet all the way up to just below the knees. Now, do the same with the arms, filling from the elbow to the wrist. Now, go about your day. At lunch grab 10 cinder blocks and attach 5 to each ankle with log chains. Continue through the day you will notice that every joint becomes harder to move as the metal in the suit of armor begins to rust and lose range of motion. You get off of work and remember you need to stop by the grocery store for milk and a loaf of bread. You grab a cart, put 100 pounds of water in the cart and tie a goat to each side of the cart. Carry on through the store to get your two items. It is after work, so it is fairly busy. You have to stand in line with the goats and try to keep them from eating all the magazines and delicious treats by the register. Now when you get home, take a sleeping pill, but do NOT go to sleep until 10 pm. And that just about accurately describes fatigue. It is not just needing a nap, it is dragging dead weight around all day. And yet, the most amazing thing is… no one can even tell from the outside. But I know, it affects what I decide to do/not do after I leave work. It robs me of the time to do things that I want to do. I would love to be an advocate for MS.. but the darn MS fatigue gets in my way. :( The other half of the matter is that I never know how long I will be without other symptoms. I could hit the publish button on this blog and all the sudden, lose the ability to use my right leg, my left arm, anything that is controlled by nerves. Some of those symptoms could be invisible to everyone but me, like ringing in the ears. However, some can be very visible as well as very inconvenient. It’s a constant cloud of “in your face, you can’t make any definite plans” that lurks in my shadows.

In addition to the uncertainty of MS, my daughter has started (and is almost complete with an associates in Radiology Technology!) college already and my son will graduate high school in May of next year. IMG_0013 With our student loans and other obligations, we couldn’t save for college, nor can we pay their college debts. Completely not how I imagined my life when I was younger. Although I didn’t envision MS either. But, it is what it is. My daughter is working hard for scholarships and has been blessed thus far. I think that she understands the pain of living paycheck to paycheck and will make efforts to never do that in her lifetime. In one year, my life will not change doing the same thing I was 5 years ago. I love my job and the people that I work with, however, I can’t ignore the fact that tomorrow is not for sure. Not only do I have a better chance of medical issues than the average person, but really no one is guaranteed physical stamina, economics, or just plain life… you never know when you will be hit like I was with some medical ailment that will change your life forever, when the economy for your company will drop and your career is halted prematurely, or when your life is stopped short due to an accident of sorts. Sallie Mae sure doesn’t have any sympathy, so, if I want anything about my situation to change, I have to take the action. It is up to me to make a difference in my future. And I love traveling, sitting on beaches, relaxing in the sunshine listening to the waves crash the shore. DSCN1068I want to be able to do that whenever I want and at this point in time, Sallie Mae along with my other creditors are not sympathetic to my desires, they just want their regular monthly payment. So again, it is up to me to make a difference. That is my why.

So, instead of sitting idly by, I have dusted off my dreams and pursued an opportunity as an Independent Agent with Seacret Direct. Why?

1. Their products are phenomenal, high quality. This before and after is taken after a 15 minute treatment! recover 2
2. Their products contain Dead Sea minerals – The Dead Sea is known for its healing properties. Cleopatra bathed in the Dead Sea and attributed it to her youthful appearance.
3. Their compensation plan is through the roof for potential.
4. Not only agent compensation, but they have a preferred customer plan that is very beneficial to the customer! (Customers- its imperative to treat them like they are the best thing since sliced bread!)
5. By having a dream, by believing that it will happen, I give myself the fire to battle fatigue everyday. Because I know that one day, I can use my time as I want and not worrying about punching the time clock.

“A successful entrepreneur can’t be afraid of failures or setbacks. An initial setback can be a great opportunity to take a new and more promising approach to any problem, to come back stronger than ever.”
~John Roos

What are your dreams? How can I help you make a plan for them to come true?

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  • TiaanJonker

    Thanks for this! Thought provoking and uplifting!

  • Marika Charalambous

    Definitely uplifting and it’s something we should all do more often – believe in ourselves.